~ IN THE HANDS OF GRACE~

I yearn to cry in this instant

Only to relieve my soul

From years & years of holding back

Afraid of tears

 

I want to cry

Naked today

Only to cleanse all of my skin

The piercing wound I’ve inflicted on myself this time

In the place where I took my first breath

 

I want to shed a peaceful tear

On a terrace of hopes & dreams

At the sight of luminous mountains

Without regret

Without censor

I want to Be

 

I want to ponder on the Truth

To say I’ve loved so faithfully

Beautifully

Without self glance
and lift it all in prayer
to God’s very hands

For blessing in His own way

 

I want to pray &  shed a tear

A word that says “I AM”

An unspoken voice that runs from ties

And a heart surviving

In magical Grace

For as many days as Heaven wishes…

That I Be. 

~ * ~

 IMG_4110

©Anaid K.C.

27042015BOG

~Renewal~

~I cried one last tear
before I hit the ground
I pleaded for years 
but it wasn’t around
neglecting my fears
I now stand up and shout…
“This is me…and I count”
 
~I waited a year
giving all which I vowed 
I played on death’s ears
and survived it somehow
a hummingbird on my window
sang out loud …
“Won’t you smile, won’t you smile?”
 
~I sang to that song
though it had been a while
sweet melody embracing my aches
with pure smiles
a choir of angels appeared from all sides
Saying …
“from now on your illness subsides”
 
~I swam like a mermaid
in this ocean so true
I believe it is real
with my eyes closed I do
I sing to the world 
now it has come my turn
“I will live
&
I will dance too!”
 
Org. 27092009/Delray Beach, FL
©Anaid K.C.
 

~My Fortune in a Prayer of Gratitude~

*

I may not have it all down here at this place

where hearts are broken

spirits darken

dreams shatter

more often than not.

But when I go Home,

once it is all said and done,

I can lift my chin with humble pride

and say…

“Lord, I have cried, 
and I have not been a perfect being
but truly my heart was at the right place
attempting at each moment to put You first, 
as not to attack or damage myself,
or any others (Your children).
Yet, 
I failed time & time again,
I cried
I hurt deeply.
This world, 
our Earth,
it revolves on other things, 
ones I rebelled to focus on. 
It has been isolating being the “odd one”
often being “out” for being good. 
 
Still, no regrets.
 
I will smile
when I meet YOU and angels.
Thank You for not letting me forget . . .
You are always by my side
You carry me when I cry . . .
You’ll be there when I die . . . 
Until Eternity.”  
 
 

                                                                                                                                                                   ©Anaid K.C.
                                                                                                                                                                                 (org.04022008BRFL)

~It Is The Way We Are~

I am not the kind of girl with a stubborn heart

I am not the kind of girl who has to wonder

I am the kind that slows down to the rhythm of nature

As gently as to hear what it whispers clearly

And it says my heart is wise

And it says my heart knows

And it says my heart only sickens when all is out of order

All which has a natural way

Only when man controls THE WAY

Only then is health and purity threatened

Only then does toxicity aim against Earth itself

And it says it is then we ALL die

It is how we as a world scarce

It is then how as a nation we fail

It is every man and every woman lying about their heart

Pretending and detouring

Controlling THE WAY & THE TRUTH

DENYING that which IS

It is every child we suppress of beauty

It is every animal we reject

IT IS US

Not living in the flow

Not remembering our essence

Dishonoring LIFE

The WAY & the TRUTH

AND OURSELVES

It is my Heart

It is yours

And their disunion

You & I

And not the things of the world.

 ©Anaid K.C.

 

~God’s Beloved~

 
 How to even begin to mourn your absence?
How when it would be
As erroneous as
Mourning spilled milk a midst a storm
A cup that has overflowed
And a face of tears disguised in rain
 
How to even begin to count ONE loss?
When outside the doors are wide and reappearing
How?
When I’ve come across a golden gate
A heart full of wander
And a Soul blessed in His name
 
I AM God’s beloved spoiled one
Too thankful to cry
Much too in love with LIFE
To even know what lonely is
Too suppressed by struggle
To have the time to look for a fifth leg
Much too grateful
Much too awestruck
Much living a MIRACLE
 
I AM God’s beloved
Spoiled one
And all I have done
Was pray in the rain.    
 
~*~

                                                                                                                                                                                     ©Anaid K.C.

                                                                                                                                                                                      27122013

~ If Forever Only Lasts Till Yesterday ~

I cannot think of a better way to have spent my last years

If that is to be the case

I’d never felt as free … as alive

Being held strongly there in your arms

gently enough to dance with you

A multitude of fond memories I have accumulated with you

Even though at times I thought

if we were broken… “How could we be apart forever?”

We could not!

I…

with the assumption that “forever” was a long time

Now…

I am seeing the world through different eyes

In my heart I am still me…

-the naive one-

who just once more believes whole heartedly in a miracle

One that will vanish away any illness present

as if it’d never been there at all.

And if…God’s will differs from mine

I will bow in total resignation & acceptance

somehow blessed I would honor my fate

for it is in my Lord’s hands.

 ©Anaid K.C.

(~03292008BCFL)

~My Number One Star~

What else could there ever be…  My number One

Not all the water of the ocean could ever survive

Not without our Love’s birth

Not without our walks on the shore

Not without your kiss by the moon over the sea

Not without the way we’d greet the dawn & the Light

Not without you & me

Dolphins swam on the horizon

Of a new day for you & I

As one more kiss of a million we would daily be

As the whole Universe in an order just too intertwined

Became for us to see

What else could there ever be?

Or ever has been… My number One

Not all the ocean

Not the seven seas

Could say you were not my star…

My number One

(11132013CSFL)

©Anaid K.C.

~Lion’s Heart~

He roars

yet is sweet

He hunts 

and he sleeps

He is King 

gallant & tall

He is my Love

He is my ALL.

He has traveled far

in the wild

somehow

finding my smile.

Through rocks, rain & sun

we’ve held on to our song

‘Cause I know… 

when there’s thunder

I can settle his storm 

with ALL of MY LOVE…

HE IS MY HUSBAND. 

(R.I.P My Love)

~ ♥ ~ 

©Anaid K.C.

(~04292008BCFL)

~HOMELESS WITH THE TREATS OF FATE~

Tears join me

for a new dance

the joyful one

the one which envelops me

with Peace I’ve never known

not before

’till NOW.

I sing & I dance

not knowing “how”

the melody of Truth

has found me homeless

It has sheltered me

with Love I’ve never known

not before

’till NOW.

I fall back on a cloud

that evaporates all yesterdays

I open my eyes

to step forward somehow

unknowing I feel at ease

with the Stillness & the Silence

I have always known

within ME…

Could I BE HOME?

©Anaid K.C.

~UNITED~

TODAY …

I LOOKED IN YOUR EYES

AND I SAW MY OWN SOUL

I FELT WHAT I’VE KNOWN

FOR SO VERY LONG

IT WAS JUST AS I HEARD

YESTERDAY IN A SONG

NOW …

WITHIN ME IS THE SUN

AND THIS IS OUR DAY

TOGETHER WE RISE

AS ONE SINGLE DAY

OUR HEAVENLY FATHER & MOTHER

REJOICE AS WE PRAY

TOGETHER AS ONE

UNITED IN LOVE AND IN LIGHT

CREATING A BETTER EARTH

SO VERY PEACEFUL AND BRIGHT!

©Anaid K.C.

(~10102010MD)

~Violet Rain~

 

There is something inside me
That won’t let me cease the way ahead
To a world so exciting
That will carry me to a brighter day
Though the voices of darkness
Cloud my space with their webs
I won’t fade in their cloudy stormy ways
For the gray gloomy words they speak my way
Fall right pass me as rain that clears its self away
So no evil can harm me
It’s bounced quickly back to where it came
And my heart keeps on dancing
Through the storms I am well
My soul dwells in this bright beam
Of the 7th violet healing rain
That remains ever-present
In my dreams or when I wake
It’s the color inside me
That comes through my voice when I speak
And the calmness about me that others so seek
It’s what soothes those around me
Why babies sleep in my embrace
It’s the warm gentle touch that caresses each day
Violet rain that embodies all that’s greater than I
Lets the world meet my goddess
When they look in my eyes
Fairy dust in my veins
That won’t let me astray
Deepest treasure so violet
Lives in me for always.

©Anaid K.C.

~I Believe In Miracles~

Dear Heaven:

I ask for Your Magical Wand

Transform my disappearance to become a swan

Convert any hatred towards me into sand

Do this with the Glory of Your Loving Hand

Make castles so gorgeous that crumble with rain

Heal all of their darkness and cure all their pain

Those souls who lack kindness

Have a blessing of peace and love sent towards them

Have many of them….

Have all eyes of envy admire our ways

Instead of the critical and judgmental craze

Let their thoughts be supportive and well wishes be born

Let their hearts be warm and with compassion form

Let their hands reach out to give and pull up those who fall

Let me be twice of this and let me be all

Which is good…. which is peaceful

Which is patient…. and Divine

Let me never forget that their souls are  like mine

Let us give back a portion of all blessings we’ve received

Give opportunities to others…. they deserve we believe

Let us be patient when their progress is slow

Let them take their pace as long as they grow

Let us help them in ways that they need…. not our own

Let us aid the world for a better day

Let us do it together when at night we pray

Let me be a reminder when I smile or cry

Let this message be known through the depth of my eye.

©Anaid K.C.

~G Y P S Y W O R D S~

Riding into a daydream

my horse so wild

it only responds to the sound of my calling

my gentle calling

spontaneous calling

always for an adventure to come.

Dreaming by day

working by starlight

as I write

I foretell my own fortune

as well as the luck from a few whom I love

I tell of my dreams which hint of our lives

I tell of my instincts

and of my vibes

I am a gypsy.

A trillion of silks envelop my being

a richness of auras embraces my skin

and after all the dancing by the moon tonight

has exhausted my traveling feet

I retire to sleep at the sound of the creek

the creek from which I drink

as the sunlight comes to greet.

I win all my battles

the ones I choose to beat

as I defeat my demons

and the demons on the street

My swords are my own hands

the only palms I cannot read

my eyes could tell stories

which my lips don’t care to speak

I am a wanderer.

I reside under one velvet shawl

I knitted for my fleet

taking nothing from all places

which enrich me while I sleep

I give away my love made treasures

Be they jewels

Be they me

Be they words of wisdom

Be they inspirations to complete

I give my all I have to give

none of it is meant for me and not for keeps

I pass on forward all my knowing

my gold coins

my rose hips

I toss them all up to the Universe

up towards Heaven

Above me

in the hands of the Father

I rest my fate

my destiny

for I know nothing is my own

the Lord is my shepherd

and I His Gypsy.

©Anaid K.C.

(~05092012DC)

The Check & The Mate

 

You know the one that I am now.

You’ve seen me at my worst difficult times,

you saw my “strength” and “warrior” come out

attempt their best at life.

I don’t regret anything but I am changed.

I’m not so fragile and delicately sensitive

that’s a good thing for me.

Nor would I repeat my errors.

I will balance my wills better, and I do.

I will stand on fertile soils and not beat the concrete senseless.

I will make new mistakes and learn new lessons,

but I believe I will do so more carefully

more gently with others and myself.

I know that I hurt  twice holding the toxins.

Don’t know how to knock my walls down

because I’m fond of them.

It’s safe to me

even though I’m inside with the poison!!

And it’s making me extravagantly ill!

I guess all in due time.

I need to be gentle

Protect myself through thick and thin like my life depended on it…

and it does!

All the resentments have not disappeared

they were frozen in time

and have taken over my physical body to get my attention.

My “life”, as people knew it,

was placed on “checkmate”

I won that …battle-game.

I built barriers and I still stand behind them.

When one is hurting or clouded it’s another story.

The thing with the school of life is…

just when you think you’re good and clear and got it,

you get quizzed and put in front of those whom you’d rather evade.

That’s when all info goes bananas….

If I could draw a line in the sand and say…

“As of today I start all over,

new people, new world”

then I’d be super great!

No problem.

But of course it’s true…I can create my world

but I can’t run away and not face my demons.

So I have been pushing away

ignoring them all my life.

It’s what I do.

So I read this quote in a “Conversations With God”…

“Live a life that is nourishing,

rewarding,

taking you someplace,

by changing ANY aspect of your life that you no longer find joyful.”  p.202

A new world ahead

new and better ways to be a part,

and one,

with the world and nature.

We influence a change in every person we come into contact with

and it is very simply either of love or fear.

You always have to play it by ear,

which means on the last played note,

not the songs of yesterday,

nor anticipating on the yet to be played.

I resent very much people who seemed apparently loving

but were actually never capable of loving because they were afraid of loss.

And I feel, in retrospect, like a pun in their game!

Be well with YOU

that brings out a whole other ball game.

Romantic love is only a small dividend of the whole in a woman’s life.

Give time, dedication,

love, and attention to ALL your houses of Self………..

BALANCE.

Don’t give it a yay, nor a nay but just keep focusing.

The more you try to fight off or figure out your shadow,

the more you empower it.

It will entertain you all day

and all night if you let it…..even in your dreams.

But before “it” starts putting ideas on you

about what you may want to do to avoid it…

know that the more you go against it the more it sticks.

It will go to immeasurable lengths to be,

and to have control over you,

because it only want is to survive

Unfortunately,

women in particular arrive here too late,

or never get pass the point

or at least not until they are much older

and they miss out on living in the Light.

So be grateful to have arrived,

be grateful to be privileged

with the knowledge of the grand challenge.

How long this phase takes you

is all up to you,

but “time” is an illusion,

so more importantly is really getting it,

rather than how long it takes.

We all have a “Light” self,

I will call it that……And we all have a “shadow” self.

YOU and you only.

Lets focus on that

leave the rest for later,

as later it will take care of itself.

Life rearranges itself in relation to our inner status.

We attract, or repel, depending on our inner energy,

so looking within is crucial in any situation

even when it seems exterior.

~.~

©Anaid K.C.