Night after night of keeping awake

I wonder if this might be “it”

the beginning?

or the end?

I revise all I’ve known

nothing seems the same 

Its all been colored differently

for the rest of time

Short time? 

or long days? 

I’ve paused life

to simply await answers

attempting to prepare

for the best and the worst 

I keep my anguish to myself

Out loud I say that I will be o.k.

I lie 

I wonder what will result 

if I’ll laugh or I will cry 

Who will I run to in relief

or in despair? 

Once I stop pretending I am o.k. 

~ . ~

(~03282008BCFL)

©Anaid K.C. 

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